I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
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She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
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I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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