good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
