I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
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