And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
