the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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