I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
