OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
