Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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