You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
