how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
she told me i tasted like america
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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