i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
