Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize