Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Send help, water and tortillas.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
