just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She is in my trunk
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
