are you so shy because you have an std?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize
