You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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