so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
