He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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