You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize