he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
