Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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