If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
