this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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