I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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