didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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