either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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