Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
