and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize