No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
