just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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