All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"