Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize