I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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