i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
