Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
