Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
