Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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