he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
