Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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