were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
