So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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