I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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