i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
