she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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