I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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