I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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