I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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