Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
