I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize