Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Randomize
