I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
