Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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