If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
